The Art of the Start
“I don’t have the right equipment.”
“There are thousands of others who are doing what I want to do.”
“Who am I to ask others questions? I’m not an expert.”
For years, these thoughts roamed through my head, preventing me from starting something I wanted to do.
A podcast where I could create a space for others to be seen, heard and valued.
Before you read any further, please acknowledge and internalize the following, “It doesn’t have to be perfect.”
Self-limiting belief #1: “I don’t have the right equipment.”
The first few episodes, I recorded using a MacBook Pro, Blue Yeti, and a picture from our first fundraising event, which I hung in the background of my closest to give it a more professional feel.
“Closet?”
“Yup, I recorded the episodes from my apartment closet.”
It was the only room I could control the sound quality.
I had to move all of my clothes to a side where they weren't being seen in the background and run the AC an hour before, otherwise it became unbearably hot (Texas heat).
On days when I forgot to turn on the AC in advance, I recorded the episode via audio only. I didn’t want the guest to see me sweating profusely.
Self-limiting belief #2: “Who am I to be hosting a podcast and asking questions to others? I’m not an expert.”
I believed these thoughts for a long time prior to starting the podcast.
I still wonder at times, how many projects I could have started and finished if I understood what I know now, “Who says that I have to be an ‘expert’ to start? "No one is an expert when they start."
I re-framed it in my mind, and gave myself permission to ask questions that I wanted to know the answers to.
Self-limiting belief #3: “There are thousands of others who are doing what I want to do.”
So, what?
“Why can’t I be the millionth?” I asked myself.
It may be true that there are thousands of others doing similar things.
However, no two conversations are the same, questions may be heard differently depending on who is asking, answers will be different depending on how the question is asked and who is asking it.
I’m curious to hear from you, “What do you want to start now that your thoughts may have held you back from previously?”
If you don’t know how to start something ask for help. Reach out to people who know more about whatever it is, be curious, research, surround yourself with others who have experience in doing the same thing and learn from them.
I’m here for you and happy to share what I know. Your network is here for you. We’re all here cheering you on!!!
Oleg Lougheed is the host of the Overcoming Odds Podcast, where you get a glimpse into the stories of individuals who have overcome adversity, suffering, and struggle in achieving their personal success.
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“There is no such thing as a stupid question.”
She said, “There is no such thing as a stupid question.”
I will never forget those words.
For months prior to her saying those words, I would sit in the corner of the room, trying to make myself invisible.
Every Monday and Wednesday morning, I used to enter her 9th grade English class, thinking, “Please don’t pick me, please don’t pick me."
I would pray over and over again that I was not the next one she called on.
The class started at 7:50am. I would do my best to be there by 7:45am to reserve my seat, the corner desk right by the window.
I chose the seat that was the furthest from the teacher, so that it would increase my chances of not being seen or called upon.
I remember the routine vividly.
I’d walk in.
Walk super-fast toward the desk, lightly nudging some of the students that stood in my way.
Pull out the book we were reading and place it standing on top of the desk.
I purposely placed the book standing up on the top of the desk, so I could hide my face behind it, as the rest of my body slid down the plastic chair beneath the wooden desk.
The rest of the time, I concentrated on the big, round clock, hanging above the chalkboard, waiting for it to strike 9:15am.
As I said before, I followed this routine for months, until one day, Judith DeWoskin, my 9th grade English teacher, chose to address the whole classroom with the following, “There is no such thing as a stupid question.”
I felt an elephant had been lifted off my chest after I heard those words.
Her words gave me permission to ask questions and not feel less than.
I didn’t have the courage to immediately.
It took me years to develop the courage to ask questions, seek answers.
But, what was important during those years was her message, “There is no such thing as a stupid question.”
As I sit here today, reflecting back on that moment in my 9th grade classroom, close to nine years ago, I can’t help, but think of the impact her words had on me.
I don’t know if she knew the impact those word would have on students at the time, but she does now.
At least the impact that it had on me. Because I told her.
“There is no such thing as a stupid question.”
Those words made me realize the importance of asking questions.
We are all on our own individual paths to acquire knowledge.
I encourage you to ask questions, seek answers.
In my opinion, it doesn’t matter whether those surrounding you want to know the same things you do, what matters most is, “What do YOU want to know?”
“There is no such thing as a stupid question.”
If you enjoyed this, please share your thoughts by commenting below or joining us on one of our weekly, “Courageous Conversations” virtual meetup gatherings.
Oleg Lougheed is the host of the Overcoming Odds Podcast, where you get a glimpse into the stories of individuals who have overcome adversity, suffering, and struggle in achieving their personal success.
Everyone We Meet Knows Something We Don’t
It was late at night, I was scrolling through my LinkedIn feed, as Kelly Merbler’s post caught my eye.
1 minute ... 5 minutes ... 10 minutes later, I was still sitting there, eyes glued to my computer screen, reading her post over and over again.
In particular, re-reading one of the last sentences, “Everyone we meet knows something we don’t.”
I thought, “This is so true! We all have value to add to each other regardless of our circumstances.”
I then immediately thought of a time I shared with a homeless man on my trip to San Diego last year.
“Every little bit helps.” a sign a man was holding in the middle of the street.
As I passed him, I thought to myself, “How many people actually stop and talk to him?”
Sure, he may not be “properly” dressed, ripped jeans and in need of a warm shower.
I thought, “Regardless of his appearance, he’s still a human being.”
Instead of going to my initial destination prior to my interview with NBC, I chose to stop by the closest restaurant to buy (2) sandwiches.
As I walked out of the restaurant, I saw that the homeless man was no longer standing in the same place.
He was making his way up the street.
“Sir, sir,” I screamed across the street.
As I caught up to him, I asked, “Would you like to share a meal with me?”
“Yes,” he responded.
We sat together, on the curb, cars passing on both sides of us, sharing memories from our past and a laugh or two.
I realized something in that short time we spent together on the curb.
Perception is everything.
I chose to look at him as another human, wanting to be seen, to be heard and to be supported.
I did not have any preconceived expectations about him. I simply chose to SEE him.
I created a space where he could experience being seen, heard and supported. I believe most of us want this in life.
I asked him, “How many people stop and talk to you?”
His response, “none.”
Tears fell from my eyes, as in that word “none” I knew that people’s perceptions had won their view.
What this moment and so many others made me realize is the importance of creating a place for others to be accepted, seen and valued.
We’re all at different phases of our lives and in our growth.
None of us are better than the other.
As Kelly initially wrote, “Everyone we meet knows something we don’t.”
Let us all be open to learning from others, to accept others and to create spaces for others to be understood.
If you enjoyed this, please share your thoughts by commenting below or joining us on one of our weekly, “Courageous Conversations” virtual meetup gatherings.
Oleg Lougheed is the host of the Overcoming Odds Podcast, where you get a glimpse into the stories of individuals who have overcome adversity, suffering, and struggle in achieving their personal success.
How do you choose to see yourself?
“How do I choose to see myself?” I thought as I was getting ready to embark on the next chapter of my life, college.
Was I going to continue to see myself as my classmates and teachers saw me?
It was difficult to leave the place I was raised in since I was 12 years old; the smell of my mom’s freshly-made, perfectly-cooked blueberry pancakes; the cloudy afternoons when I helped my Dad shovel the snow off the driveway; the hours I played with our dogs, Derby and Rocky, rolling around on the floor of the family room, becoming a vacuum as I picked up all of the dirt around me.
As difficult as it was to leave, I knew that I had to go.
I’ll always remember that car ride, sitting in the middle section of my mom’s minivan, tears streaming down my face, envisioning what this next chapter of my life could be, an opportunity to redefine how I chose to see myself.
In the prior years, middle school and high school, I was viewed as a “trouble maker” and sometimes a “bully”.
I would talk back to teachers, I made fun of classmates, I was disruptive. This was the expectation of my peers and so I became what they expected me to be.
I spent more time in the principal’s office than anyone ever wanted to.
For the longest time, I wanted to forget all of those experiences.
I wanted to forget about all of the pain I may have caused others.
But, instead, I chose not to forget the pain I may have caused. I chose to look at those experiences head-on and all the lessons that I could learn from them.
One of the greatest lessons I learned was that I do not have to be what people perceive me to be. I can choose who I want to be.
Going to college helped me break that cycle, it instilled enough excitement and hope within me that my life could be different.
I didn’t know HOW, I just believed that it was POSSIBLE.
I look back at that time in my life to remind myself that all is POSSIBLE. It is POSSIBLE to view myself in a different light despite the circumstances I was born into; it is POSSIBLE to leave my tribe behind and join a new tribe; it is POSSIBLE to dig deep enough to rid myself of negative behavior. It is POSSIBLE to learn from past experiences; it is POSSIBLE to love myself wholeheartedly.
It is POSSIBLE!
If you enjoyed this, please share your thoughts by commenting below or joining us on one of our weekly, “Courageous Conversations” virtual meetup gatherings.